What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
Last Updated: 19.06.2025 00:26
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
Why do unattractive men assume that a pretty woman like me want them?
TEXT:
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Bucheron and Myriel’s Karyn Tomlinson win James Beard Awards - Star Tribune
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
I have a bad reputation and need help. What should I do?
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
Why is the show The Big Bang Theory so hated?
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
What do porn stars do when they get old?
At least until the peyote kicks in ...
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
Do handsome guys intimidate women or people in general?
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
Make Nazis afraid again!
Why do so many autistic adults deal with self-hatred?
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
Can a meme heal what therapy can't?
Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.